It’s easy to get caught up in negativity and feel like life hates you. You can go down a path of feeling bad and asking “why me?” Let me pop your bubble — Yes, dreadful things will happen to you. You’ll experience bad relationships, difficult client situations, sucky friendships and times of being broke – owing more than you have. Unfortunately when it rains, it pours or it has a tendency to feel that way. I’ve had this experience – when I’m already knocked down something else will occur to knock me even further down. One small rough moment and all of a sudden another one and another one. Before you know it you feel like you’re drowning to the point that you can’t even breathe.
It’s easy to get depleted, angry and continue drowning – it’s not easy to see the silver lining. It’s easy to say “Of course, kick me when I’m down.” It’s harder to change your perspective and actually take these hits as signs or bigger life lessons. You can’t let the low moments keep you stagnant or overly emotional. We will all experience highs and lows. It’s much easier to place the anger and blame on the other person. It’s easier to keep drowning and falling deeper and deeper than it is to begin swimming against the current and try to get to the surface.
“If you’re in a bad situation, don’t worry it’ll change. If you’re in a good situation, don’t worry it’ll change.” -John A. Simone, Sr.
You have to want to move ahead. You have to be willing to accept your cards even if they are absolutely crappy. You have to be ready to deal with the mess, the shit, the horror. I know seems pretty obvious – why wouldn’t you want to get the heck out of the ick. After being kicked when I’m down and continuing to drown deeper and deeper – the biggest lesson I’ve learned is that nothing stays still. Things change. People change. Situations change. Both for the good and the bad.
Even more important is that when you stop believing that you won’t ever get out of it because you will. The more you get dealt – the stronger life believes you are. Once we drown and resurface the next time we start losing our breath the easier it will be to get our breath back and move ahead. One shitty experience will make you realise how strong you actually are. Drowning is good because it teaches you that you can survive and come out on the other side that much stronger that much more resilient. When you drown it means you decided to jump into an ocean that you weren’t fully prepared for or maybe just maybe it was out of your control and nature came and played its course making the water choppy. Either way, we must stop believing that we won’t resurface. The hardest lesson in to come to terms with is the constant review or analysing people go through. The shoulda, coulda, woulda… If only I didn’t, if only, if only, if only.
You can see it is easy to think about the steps you mistook to get you to begin suffocating. When you are already drowning this will not get you out any faster. It probably will keep you under water. Stop your pity party. Stop wasting precious time thinking about what you should have done differently. It will not help. It will not change the present. It will not magically place you somewhere different. The sooner you can stop thinking about what you should have done and stop thinking about the past the sooner you can begin to perform damage control and start swimming. Sitting around cursing yourself or others will not fix things. There is nothing wrong with letting yourself experience shitty emotions or questioning your past actions or be emotional but do it and move forward. Life wants you to move forward and get through it.
You’ll get out and then you’ll feel a new sense of strength and you’ll be ready for the next hit.
Be okay with drowning because no matter how deep you are you can get out.